Unfinished Business
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Think of an event in your life in which you were traumatized. When you think of this event, is there a feeling that is brought to the surface? If there is an emotional aspect, then this points to the fact that you still have an energetic charge in this experience that has not been cleared. When we have suppressed feelings, it means that in our minds and bodies we have “unfinished business”.
There are four phases involved in resolving unfinished business.Recalling the memory, releasing the memory, integrating a new thought pattern and resolution. Emotions are energy moving through our consciousness. This emotional energy in which we interact with other people allows us to have experiences. So, our thoughts are a form of energy and when they have an emotional charge which is suppressed, they have an affect on the mind and the body because this energy is stored in our tissues. We hold emotions in our bodies by tensing our muscles. This blocks the flow of energy. This suppresses our creative life force.
When painful experiences have been suppressed rather than expressed, then the energy from these experiences is stored in the mind and body. When feelings are not resolved, they are only hidden from our conscious awareness. When we suppress feelings, we are rejecting negative emotional experiences from our awareness. When we do this over and over again, this leads to an accumulation of emotional energy that we are not even aware of. Let’s take anger for example. When we suppress anger, during suppression, the force of the anger that was originally felt is still present; it is just below our conscious awareness. When this happens, it leads to negative attitudes and behaviors that can erupt with even more force than the original anger because we are stuck in a holding pattern that becomes a habit. This layers upon itself like the layers of an onion. When the suppression of feelings is below our conscious awareness, it feels like we are being controlled by hidden forces. We are attracted to the wrong people, reject those that are healthy for us, we become addicted to drugs to numb ourselves because we have this accumulation of energy that has been suppressed. This energy eventually has to come out. It needs to be released in order for us to be healthy.
The way to clear this energetic charge is to “feel” it. And in doing so, the energy dissipates. So, how do you feel it. One way is to find a touch therapist that understands the mind/body connection that can through specific techniques, support the body as it recalls physically, painful, suppressed memories. Recalling suppressed memories is the first step in clearing the emotional charge in the body.
When you experience these traumatic events, you must experience the emotion to the fullest. Sometimes these events are painful. When the energy of our thoughts travels through our tissues, and this energy is stored in the body, the emotion is experienced as a physical sensation. The axiom, as above, so below applies here. As above in the mind so below in the body. Any unfinished business in the mind can lead to physical problems. Processing the emotional charge eliminates the physical problem. When you can watch or “witness” the past, the charge is cleared. That is the recall phase of resolving unfinished business in the body.
How can you tell when you have discharged a painful memory? When you can think about the event and it doesn’t evoke an emotional response. You are witnessing the event as if it were a movie rather than engaging emotionally.
The thoughts that we carry around in both the mental aspect and in the body are a form of programming. These thought patterns can lead to holding patterns in both the mind and body. What needs to happen is there has to be a shift in the programming. When we react to events in our life and repeat these programs over and over again, it leads to mental and physical problems and unfinished business because the emotional charge has not been cleared. Shifting the program is assertive reprogramming. We articulate these experiences with our clients, not to the therapist but to the client using the voice to assert a new program. We take that emotional energy that was fear, or anger or guilt or whatever the emotion may be, and divert it. If you do not clear this energy through talking with a trained therapist or being treated physically by a touch therapist, you stay stuck in the old pattern. The emotional energy will bring you to the same experience. You have a pattern of release but you have to take the next step of the integration phase and assert something else, a new pattern. We have this sense that we were to blame, that we deserve to have these kinds of experiences. It’s a real powerful shift in our life to step out of that and come out of the experience of guilt, shame, or whatever it is that you are stuck in. It may not, but CAN happen in one instant.
As therapists our role is to give the client an opportunity to shift it. It is ok to experience this event, to recall it. You are ready, because you are here. If you are not ready, this just means that there are other layers. Start writing down and claiming what you want. Give it a symbol. Think about what that looks like-the new programming. Pour the new programming into the experience.
So, in review, recalling painful memories brings them to the surface and allows them to be cleared and the energy dissipated. A new, positive thought pattern is introduced to shift the negative programming so that there is a finish. There should be a beginning and an ending. This is cause and effect. Removing energy blockages in the mind gives these negative experiences an ending. In doing so we are now able to integrate a new thought pattern that allows us to live more creatively. It can be very empowering. The end result is resolution and freedom.